Skip to main content

The Awesome Threesome

I expect the DC++ hoggers already know about "Three KGPians day out", well here is a new version of it.

Four days before the end sem exams, and on the eve of the day which has three tests in store for them, three KGPians, decided to go out for a late night snack. Actually there wasnt much decision involved except for the place where they would be willing to hog down stuff. The local canteen won on the grounds that being the nearest, they would be WASTING much lesser time if they went there.

The guftagu began, after the initial rite of ordering your stuff. Two Bread Butters, one beg sandwich, and a cup of tea. No maggie, no chowmein -- seriosly these people were low on budget. Before we get any further into their actual conversation, lets name the three dramatis personae. On account of confidentiality, they have requested that they be known by aliases. So lets call them MyTh, Quark and manGO.

As the three waited for the food to arrive, manGO being in a counter reflective mood decided to take a look at the future. How would things be once they get placed at a job of their dreams? manGO started off with his flamboyance, stating that he would take the other two on a treat when he becomes employed. The level of treat would depend on the salary offered.

manGO: "Agar 6 lakh se upar ka job mila to treat at Sonar Bangla, Kolkata."
Quark: "Thik hai"
manGO: "6 se kam hua to Jam mein treat se kaam chala lena ... but acchhi jagah treat hogi"
Myth:"Bas 6"
manGO: "chalo revise karte hain"
MyTh: Nahi ab to fix ho gaya ... 6 se upar to sonar bangla
manGO: abe sun to lo ... thoda change allowed hota hai
Quark: acchha chal bol

manGO: Haan, 7.2 lakh se upar hua to Le Meridian, Delhi ... thik hai
MyTh: abe delhi mein de hi raha hai to le meridian se better hotels hain.
manGO: nahi yaar, meridian ke chhat se india gate dikhta hai
Myth(who considers himself to be an authority on delhi): abe ITC chalo na, maurya sheraton better hai ... by the way yeh 7.2 lakhs ka figure ka kya funda hai.
manGO: 60 grands per month ... simple calculation hai
MyTh: haan to treat jahan bhi hoga tu ek mahine ka salary to kharcha karega hi
manGO: haan woh to fix hai, treat ka budget ek mahine ka salary, us se exceed mat karna
MyTh: Fir maurya sheraton, final hua.
manGO: Chalo peace hai sheraton.

manGO: agar 6.0 se 7.2 ke beech mein hui to Cal mein kahin acchha jagah pe
Quark: Sonar Bangla
manGO: abe nahi sonar bangla bahut jyaada ho jayega
Quark: Five star
manGO: abe sonar bangla 5 star hai, us se thoda kam .. accha hoga , but not sonar

manGO: 5 se 6 beech mein hua to Centre Point Jamshedpur
Myth: Bhak saala, jamshedpur mein nahi
manGO: abe khaana achha hai
Quark: abe chal abhi exam ke baad khila Centre Point mein. Main 27th ko aa jata hoon. Do Din koi kaam hai nahi. wahinn masti karenge tere scooty pe.
manGO: Theek hai aa jao

manGO: 4 se 5 hua to PARK ya LS mein se kuchh choose kar lo
MyTh: aur agar 4 se kam hua to treat nahi hogi
manGO: Haan no treat for less than 4

(after some reconsideration)
manGO: abe nahi yaar, treat to hogi, 4 se kam hua to billoo's
Quark: Bhak, itna bhi ganda mat kar
manGO: theek hai, MTR .. yeh chalega
MyTh: abe park LS ke aage bhi kuchh hota hai. GIH chalo, TP chalo
manGO: abe TP ka khaan achha nahi hai
MyTh: acchha hai bhai
manGO: tu khaya hai
MyTh: haan, chicken ka saara dish try kiye hain, sab peace hai
manGO: pata nahi mere ko to acchha nahi laga

By this time MyTh has finished off his Bread Butter. Quark and manGO are still waiting for their meals.

manGO: kaun mere saath chowmein share karega
MyTh: abe yahan ka chowmein hugga hota hai
Quark: Yahan kya acchha hota hai???
MyTh: maggi kha lo
manGO: nahi woh bahut mehanga hai. Chow 8 rs ka hota hai
Quark: Maggi kitne ka hai?
manGO: 13 ka ... almost double. Chalo 1.5 times, us se jyaada actually
Quark: haan aise IITian bolega

Finally Bread Butter -2 and Sandwich arrive

manGO: chalo ek Bread Veg Bhujia share karte hain
Quark: haan thik hai
manGO: Dada, ek Bread Bhujia, Veg ... haan ab tum log batao
MyTh: Abe kya tum log khaane mein lage rahte ho
manGO: Khaane se btter aur kya hota hai, abe tu bata ... tu 4 year wala hai ... tera job pehle lagega
Quark: ha ha .. dekho 6 se upar laga to le Meridian ... kahin ka bhi ... jahaan bhol ... delhi jaipur ... haan main jaipur prefer karoonga
manGO: Delhi is fine ... waise nahi tu jaipur mein de ... fir agle saal main delhi mein doonga
Quark: haan aur bolo to party ke baad ... uhhmmm
manGO: abe nahi ... hopefully tab tak apne paas apni bandi hogi
MyTh: 8th sem tak tere paas bandi ... koi chance hi nahi hai
manGO: thik hai, to tu hoga na, tere se kaam chala lenge
Quark: dekho mere treat mein ek bandi to hogi
MyTh: haan teri hogi na
Quark: nahi, yaar woh nahi hogi, woh daaru waaru ka load degi, abhi ande ka load de diya
MyTh: abe daaru kahan se aaya daaru nahin hoga
manGO: abe nahi kuchh to hoga, champagne hoga
Quark: meri bandi uska bhi laod degi
manGO: thik hai fir teri bandi nahi aayegi

Food finished, Bread bhujia arrived in the meanwhile. that has gone down the drains too.

manGO: chal mote ab tu bata
MyTh: yeh sab aise hi thode batate hain
manGO: abe chal na ab bol ... itna secret wicret kuchh nahi hota hai
MyTh: Hmmm
Quark: abe mote bol de ... dekhen bhi to tera kaun sa special plan hai
manGO: chal bol, 8 lakh se upar hua to
MyTh: bas 8 ... itna kam
manGO: abe 8 and above ek hi category hota hai ... 8 se upar mein kuchh bhi huha kar sakte hain.
MyTh: abe 8 matlab kitna hua
(Myth is a bit slow in maths .. dats why he is in the maths dep :D)
manGO: abe 8 yaani, approx 70 grand per month
MyTh: to fir 4 days in GOA
Quark: yeh to saala tour package type hai, 4 days in goa
manGO: 4 days 3 nights
Quark: 11 -- 11 -- 11 -- 11
manGO: 11 -- 11 -- 11
manGO: abe fir bahar kahi chal, mauritus singapore types
Quark: abe new zealand chalo
MyTh: abe nahi, usme bahut jyaada lag jaayega

Quark: abe tere life mein aisa kya hoga ki tu 7-star mein party dega
manGO: mera shaadi -- 11
MyTh: abe 7-star hotel kahan hai
Quark: Hai na Burj Al Arab, dubai chalenge ... mote tu leke chalna
manGO: abe nahi wahan mote ka account hoga, hum log kha ke bolenge, dada mote ke account mein likh do
Quark: 11

manGO: Abe formula 1 dekhne chalte hain ... nahi chhod ManU ka game dekhne chalte hain
MyTh: uuuuuummmmm
manGO: Champions League game, EPL WiPL nahi
MyTh: nahi ManU vs Arsehol dekhenge
Quark: aur champions league mein us saal game nahi hua to
manGO: tab to EPL dekhna padega ... england ka ticket ka kitna lagega
Quark: 70000, ek aadmi ka
manGO: 70 khaali aane jane ka lag jayega? bhak saala

manGO: abe mote ek kaam karte hain. apan dono to same year mein pass out honge. Mil ke treat karte hain
Quark: abe hum bhi honge
manGO: abe tu already job mein hoga
Quark: par treat mein to honge
manGO: haan, hum aur mota sponsor karenge ... gautemala types kahin chalte hain
Quark: abe jahan hills wills ho
manGO: Madagascar
Quark: New Zealand chalo na saalon
MyTh: abe tu boiled egg mangaya tha

manGO and MyTh attack Quark;s eggs ... he defends ... eventually they order one for themselves. Not one each ... one shared between the two of them. Peace prevails

manGO: abe NZ se acchha hai South Africa chalo
Quark: haan wahan paisa bhi accha milta hai ... aur hum job ke liye wahan ja bhi skate hain

News Flash: Quark is in mining department

manGO: haan chalo fir sabka pakka na
MyTh: haan ja mara
manGO: dada, total kar do kitna hua
Quark: abe matar
manGO: saala jab tab matar khaayega
Quark: yippe
MyTh: abe subah test se pehle mere ko jaga dena
manGO: hmm
Quark: Kuchh padha hai
MyTh: nahi
Quark: Kuchh Aata hai
MyTh: nahi
Quark: matlab perparation complete hai, badhiya
MyTh: Chalo bye, gud nite
manGO: haan

manGO: abe A jod U = O hota hai na ... jaise varsh + utsav = varshotsav
Quark: hmm
manGO: aur AH jod AA kya hota hai
..
.
.
.
.
.



And so they went off to sleep. Wish them all the best for the ECO test and the forthcoming END SEMS.

Comments

  1. awsome...
    great job...baki baad mein

    ReplyDelete
  2. saale is time mein kuch padh letato woh 8 waala kaam hone chnces badh jaate.....

    ReplyDelete
  3. manGO: thik hai, to tu hoga na, tere se kaam chala lenge

    yeh kab bola tha saale tu????

    ReplyDelete
  4. good luck to them from me also....

    ReplyDelete
  5. which means u read the blog@MyTh
    thoda mirch masala agana padta ha
    he he

    ReplyDelete
  6. good luck to them from me also...

    ReplyDelete
  7. abe agar 8 wala kaam ho hi gaya to fir is blog ka matlab kya bachega
    @MyTh

    ReplyDelete
  8. thanks for the gud luck ...
    @kisalay
    @anon ... naam to likh dete yaar

    ReplyDelete
  9. @blindquare

    tnx for the compliment

    baaki jo baad mein hai woh likh dena

    ReplyDelete
  10. see strictly literarily speakin... bullshit
    but saala apan lite.... kab se baat karne lage...
    good work man... lagey raho
    the philosophical junkie extends his accolades

    ReplyDelete
  11. manGO sirjee.... I bow before your great presence... the eternal master of bhaat proving himself once again....

    ReplyDelete
  12. Hey manGO 8 wale treat mein ham bhi aayenge...
    waise guys kolkata trip aur bhaat with first years ke baad mango ke paas logo ko sulaane ka ek naya tarika

    ReplyDelete
  13. hmmm ... jo logn ko bhi 8 wale treat mein shaamil hona hai ... dont post anon message ... how will i identify you

    you need not have a blogger id to post messages ... u can choose "other" option

    ReplyDelete
  14. "Awesome Threesome"??? - a better title would be " a bambling bumbling bunch of baboons" - u should be condemned to hell fire for having made me read this. If u want to become the script writer of one of Mira Nair's movies...u still have a long long way to go...a very long way infact... and obvi payscales of companies ke baare mein evidently koi idea nahin hai: 8lack package = ~37000 in hand, every month not ur dream figure of 70K.
    waise character depictions achha thha - coz ppl were speaking the way they do - Myth: being slightly better than a COW; Quark: being slightly better than a nitwit; and manGO - displaying the I.Q. of a tomato (or a mango)... :P. waise - thoroughly enjoyed writing this comment - and hope uve enjoyed reading it... :D ... waise it was nice imagining the three of u talk all bull-shit - relived a few of my old memories... ;)

    ReplyDelete
  15. this is what this post was meant to be ... all bul shit ... nice that you found it just dat ... yeah ... the longest comment ever on my blog ... nice again

    aur agar pay scale ka itna idea hota to aise bhaat thode hi maarte. :P

    btw ... i did not get the Mira Nair scriptwriter part. kindly elucidate

    ReplyDelete
  16. My God, Ritwik .. at one point, I felt that the blog was never going to end :)) Nice waise ... before a first-hour test :D I have never been able to maaro that much peace , not even in my final year ! The thought saddens me :)
    Continue having fun !

    ReplyDelete
  17. @aditi

    fun to thik hai ... only thing is fun kahin jyaada nahi ho jaaye ... and yeah when i was writing it all down .. which took around 45 mins extra .. at one point even i thought the blog is never going to end :O
    but it did ... here's wishing you some peace from my side

    ReplyDelete
  18. manGO: abe nahi wahan mote ka account hoga, hum log kha ke bolenge, dada mote ke account mein likh do

    One Line to Rule them All.

    ReplyDelete
  19. well, thats coz - been there, done that.
    well me, 02CS1032, Nitzee, RK. Need I say more ;)

    Some ppl might still remember me.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I Smell Gold : This time it's personal

Won my first individual event ever in college. Since no one else was blowing my horn, decided to do that myself. So here is my gold winning speech :) Since you might get bored half way through the speech, let me thank the people who need to be thanked right now itself: Apurva, Myth, Zoo, Xar, Kamra, Harsha and even Bishnoi :) Motion: Increasing national security and surveillance is a cosmetic response to any extremist activity in a democratic and tolerant society . :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Let me start with a very clichéd “Picture this”. I am a 7 year old boy and I behave like any 7 year old does. I hate milk and I throw a tantrum when I see a glass full of that filthy white thing. As a seven year old I probably don’t know the words tantrum and filthy, but this ignorance does not save me from the wrath of my father. He takes less than 45 seconds to get that milk down my throat. I certainly don’t like it. Thankfully, sometime later my mother explains to me why I need that milk if

Opening Lines #1

She, of the hair most unruly Trapped once, and you'd need a year to break free. She, of the eyes of a deity Trapped once, and forever hers you shall be. I had known her for eight months. And sometimes I wondered.