Follow me on: twitter facebook Deviant Art

Wednesday, September 07, 2011

Opening Lines #1

She, of the hair most unruly
Trapped once, and you'd need a year to break free.
She, of the eyes of a deity
Trapped once, and forever hers you shall be.

I had known her for eight months.
And sometimes I wondered.


Share

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Coming of Age

Sometimes, I just feel lucky to be born when I was, to be born in this time and age, to have seen so many contenders for the "Greatest of All Time" tag.

Lucky to be born in the age of Michael Schumacher and watch him beat record after record. To be born in the age of Lance Armstrong, for whom beating opponents and records was but a secondary feat. To be born in the age of Zinedine Zidane, most certainly the best of this generation, the marquee headbutt notwithstanding.

Lucky to have watched not one, but two legends, pass the baton in tennis.
When Pete Sampras lost in the Wimbledon of 01, it made fans of him hate that pony-tailed guy for ending his quest for a 5th consecutive crown. I know I did. But Pete shouldn’t mind that now, for over the course of next 8 years or so, Roger has shown that when it comes to beauty on the tennis court he has got the entire WTA beat, by a long shot (down the line).

And then there’s Sachin Tendulkar, whose one mistimed shot makes your heart skip a beat, whose every cover drive makes you smile, whose lofted straight drives (rare as they have become) makes you want to jump with joy, and whose humility only underscores his genius. The image of him taking that lap of honour at the Wankhede is going to stay with me for a long, long time.

I shall turn 25 in a few days. If ancient sages are to be believed, I would be seeing life a lot differently now. I do feel much old already. And I do feel lucky.
But, I would give it all up, in less than a heartbeat, just to be born in the age of Pink Floyd.
And having that realization makes me think, that maybe I am growing up.

Cheers.

PS: And I pray for some smart soul to make a time machine.
Bonus:


Share

Monday, March 21, 2011

Date A Girl Who Loathes Herself

Author's Note: I have been given to understand that this piece makes me look like a douche. Well, I am not. This piece was an exercise in writing, and I hope (and pray), that I am not judged on it, by girls.

Special mentions for Rosemarie Urquico for writing that wonderful piece, and for Tapas Shrivastava for making me want to write one myself.
Thanks to Rohini Lall for the spark that ignited this particular piece.



Date a girl who loathes herself. Date a girl who spends her money on comfort food. She has problems with closet space because she has too many high heels bought in moments of madness. Date a girl who has a list of failed relationships, who lost her first elocution competition when she was twelve.

Find a girl who is depressed. You'll know she is because she has that long lost look in her eye. She is the one wearing crushed pajamas in the cafeteria, the one who is fidgeting with her cell phone, contemplating whether calling her therapist third time in a day would be a bit too much. You see the weird chick with smudged mascara, and a wrinkle around her eyes. That's the self loather. They can never manage to wipe off the chocolate stain off their chin.

She is the girl drooling over her cup of frozen yogurt. If you take a closer look, you might find trails of maple syrup and chunks of strawberries. She is lost in the greyness of her dull life. Sit down. She might be cursing herself, she might curse you since she treats every new person with her fair share of skepticism. Ask her if she has had a hug in month. Maybe a year.

Buy her an extra portion of fat free gelato.

Let her know what you really think of her, with a pinch of salt. Make her feel significant. Ask her if she wants to go out with her sorority friends. See if she managed to get that promotion at the workplace she had been vying for. Understand that she had really sucked up to her boss. Tell her it is OK with you if she wants to give up on her career altogether.

It's easy to date a girl who loathes herself. Giver her a call on her birthday, maybe a card on her anniversary. That is more than enough for her. Understand that many didn't even remember it was her birthday. Keep that fire of inadequacy burning within her. Commend her on her painted toenails, but mention if her ankles look chubby. Understand that she knows the difference between the impression she has of herself and the person she really is, but she is too weak to break out of that shell. This helplessness adds wind to that fire. Raise her morale, but don't let it fly too high. It would be your fault if she begins to find you inadequate.

Lie to her. If she knows herself, she will know you are lying to gain an advantage. But that would only make her want to stick with you. She has always found it impossible to break up with men not worthy of her. She always finds herself sinking deep into the quicksand of pity. Behind every failure is a lesson she has never learnt. And she hates herself for it.

Fail her. For a girl who loathes herself, that's the caffeine that keeps her awake. She will stick to you because she cannot go through another loss. She will go out of her way to make things work. She understands that things will come to an end one day, but she does not have the guts to walk out now. You will be her hero, no matter how degenerate you are.

Girls who loathe themselves will accept you for all your flaws, because they can relate to them. They understand that deep inside you are not much different from them.

If you like a girl who loathes herself, keep her close. When you find herself sobbing at 6 in the evening because she doesn't fit in that red dress anymore, chide her. You may lose her for an hour when her hatred for herself projects on you. But then she will always come back to you, taking your chiding to be a manifestation of tough love. She'll sulk if she can't bake a good cake. Buy her one from the bakery of her choice. And then tell her you like chubby girls after all.

You will propose over chocolate ice cream. Or peanut butter sandwich. Or maybe after the next session with the therapist.

You will be smiling in you heart wondering how easy it all was. If only you had found one of them in college, instead of going after the self respecting ones. You'll mention in your journal all the things she did for you in bed, just because you didn't walk out on her. She will spend most of her life being indebted to you for bringing her out of the shithole that her life was. Your kids will have a doting mother because she does not want them to turn out like she did. She will always try to outdo herself as a wife and mother, always feeling that she is not good enough.

Date a girl who loathes herself because that is what you can achieve. You can have a girl who makes pancakes for you every morning so that you don't eat at the deli with the hot waitress. If you give her a sense of purpose and meaning to her life, then you are better off alone. Or that is what you would be then anyway; alone. But if you want to be the world and the world beyond it for her, date a girl who loathes herself.

Or better yet, date a girl who pretends to be a feminist, but isn't.


Share

Sunday, February 13, 2011

There Was A Time


There was a time I used to be young
Sang with the choir when the school bell rung
There was a time when promises were kept
There was a time I wasn't unstrung

There was a time I could name the stars
In Orion's belt and the ones afar
There was a time when my shoes did shine
There was a time I fought for marks

There was a time I loved traveling in trains
In sleeper coaches with betel stains
There was a time when Maggi was cherished
There was a time I danced in the rain

There was a time I used to be rich
10 bucks I'd have, would lend out six
There was a time I tried to be honest
There was a time when I was a snitch

There was a time I knew my F.R.I.E.N.D.S
I shed a tear when "The Last One" ends
There was a time I knew multiplication tables
There was a time I didn't have to pretend

There was a time I had the stomach to
cover the distance that somehow grew
There was a time I used to hate girls
There was a time I used to love you.
Share

Friday, November 19, 2010

Of fonts, colors and Logos

An established brand changes its brand design/ logo, and there you have it – the eternal debate between the old and the new, the classy vs. the peppy, the understated vs the wannabe. Usually its just a manifestation of people wanting to cling on to something they loved, but sometimes the rolling stone gathers a bit too much moss. GAP and Tropicana have learned the lesson the hard way, and judging by the initial reaction to Airtel logo (on Facebook and elsewhere), I guess things might just be heading in similar directions.

So what is the deal with a brand logo? My very limited experience of presenting in a couple Ad-Design competition had me memorized (more or less) my introductory speech when the logo part came in. A logo is judged on its aesthetic values – the colors, the fonts, how it fits with the overall brand image, on reproducibility and on the story it tells (I believe that every logo should have a story). But I guess, in the end its just one thing – RECALL VALUE, RECALL VALUE, RECALL VALUE. So if I ask you to think of a famous logo, probability tells me that you would think out of Nike, Coke, Google, Mercedes, and Apple. (Sadly, I could not think of even a single Indian brand logo in the same league).

Now how this recall value thingy screws up things is this: it does not matter how good or bad these logos are graphically, if either of these 5 brands, changed their imagery tomorrow, you would just hate. Most of these logos are no pieces of art in themselves – subtlety generally works for logos. So much so, that the Google logo, I feel is - for lack of a better word - the “cheapest” logo to make it big. If I tried selling a logo like that – primary colors in a serif font, I would be hit on my head with a hammer. Admittedly, the Catull variation is slightly better, with smoother edges. In recent past, I would say Facebook logo has been culprit of the same. Even though it’s much neater than Google, like Google, it works because its there.

And that brings me to what started this entire (rather misplaced) criticism – Airtel’s new logo. There is no doubt the “old” Airtel logo worked. Not just worked, it was magic in many ways. It was clean, simple, and legible and for what it’s worth, it had a great recall value. But, is the new Airtel logo that bad? Most people around me seem to think so. If you break it down – the color theme is still there, the new font is better than the last one, by far (and dare I say, sexier than the last one), and by itself it looks nice. So what’s wrong? Its not the old logo, yes. It’s a wannabe, yes – a Vodafone wannabe. But the Vodafone Speechmark is a great role model to have – fonts, colors, story, recall value and all – probably the best logo among the telcos.

On the need for change, everyone cites the Coke vs Pepsi branding as an example, how Coke has had only logo in human history whereas Pepsi has had around 20. Again, its about what works and what not, and if you ask me, Pepsi designers haven’t done a bad job of it either (there I said it, I like the new Pepsi logo as well). So did Airtel need it? In India, they surely could have done without it. The established identity, would have been a big differentiating factor in face of the new competition (your Uninors, MTSes, Videocons and Docomos). So, what their business strategy was, I can only guess. Maybe this logo is supposed to look and feel more international. But from a purely design point of view, for me, the new logo is not half as bad as the last one, recall value aside, especially put into context as on the revamped site intro (www.airtel.in). Could it have been better? A big YES (As rightly pointed out by Anvesh, they should have retained some of the black). But for me it’s a refreshing change, one I am more than happy with. It’s not a two-tone text in rectangular boxes. I have nothing against text-based logos – Canon and Oracle hold their own, SanDisk is beautiful, FedEx has a great story to tell, Amazon is sheer brilliance and I (spoiler alert) just love Microsoft. All I am saying is that if Nokia and Sony tried re-branding tomorrow, I wouldn’t be breaking a sweat. But if Nike even dreamed about anything remotely close, trust me to write a 1000 word protest letter to their CEO.

I guess, in the end it’s about personal choice, and given the initial response, a lot of the criticism would come my way for taking Airtel’s side. But the thing with brand logos is - there is one factor even more important than Recall value – and that is FIRST IMPRESSION. On that front, this Airtel logo has worked its magic on me.

All in all, my best wishes to Airtel, because fonts, colors and logos aside, they still provide the best damned service. So bring on the criticism (of the logo and this article), I will try and defend as much as I can. And while you are at it, http://www.colourlovers.com/business/blog/2010/09/15/the-most-powerful-colors-in-the-world, is one nice page to visit.
Share